Surprise

Where do you stand on surprises? Are pleasant surprises the same as unpleasant ones? Okay, no on that one. The half-life on unpleasant is very long, radioactive. But do both experiences hit you the same? Are you one of those giddy surprise-accepters? Not me, I've been a brick about surprises.

I've worked vigorously to not be taken by surprise. This is a correlation of the steady state thing that I've been droning on about. Anticipation dampens surprise and I attempted to anticipate pretty much any possibility in any interaction. What did I think I was preventing? What did I miss?

Once, I participated in an arts event that was being recorded. The sound tech spent the whole event trying to make the needles on the sound meters stay on one setting. The dynamics of the sound were nearly eliminated. Frustrating. Infurating for the director. The tech, who was obviously new, said that it was exhausting trying to keep everything on the level. Yup.

I'm tired just thinking about the energy that must have taken. Tired thinking about the energy I've used in similar pursuits. Now I have to go to bed.